We gather today to commemorate the life of ***, better known to many of us as ***. He was born October 14, 1932 in ________, ___________ and came to the United States when he was 18. In the late 1950's he moved to Albany to help his grandfather with the _____________ Café restaurant. Later, with partners Gordan and George he opened the ______________ restaurant, which, by the way, became my favorite Christmas Eve dining place!
 

On September 25, 19##, the lives and hearts of *** and Margaret were united in marriage in Vancouver, Washington. Margaret preceded him in death in June of 19##. *** was then united in the bonds of love and marriage to Donna on March 29, 19## in _____________.
 

*** is survived by his wife, Donna; his mother Fay; his daughters Sheila, Tina and Lori; his sons, Timmy and Jeffery and stepsons, Darwin, Cody and Carson; his stepdaughter, Kimberly; his 13 grandchildren and several siblings. In addition to his first wife, Margaret, *** was preceded in death by his sons, Lawrence, and Jonathan.
 

We come to remember *** fondly and to give him the honor due him from his family and friends.   We come to express our grief, and to receive comfort from one another, from the good music and from the Lord.
 

I fondly remember ***. I think of times he came to church to attend the various childrens' programs there.   He thoroughly enjoyed seeing them perform and express their faith in song and skit.

You will remember ***'s love of his animals and particularly his fondness for his pigeons and pheasants. He loved his farm and enjoyed giving people the tour. He derived pleasure in helping deliver baby animals and was sort of an "unofficial vet." He was also good with people in their illnesses and was called, "Dr. Lee" by many who knew him. He had an insight into the curative properties of the various herbs.
 

You will remember his love of a good prank and that he was a real tease. You will remember the phrase "pull my finger" which has special meaning to family and close friends. You will recall how he loved grabbing the grandkids by the thigh and giving a mild Charlie Horse - all in good fun and love to be sure!  He'd never do anything to bring them pain.
 

*** will be remembered for his love of all children. Their antics and laughter brought him deep pleasure. He loved "spoiling" children with candy and other treats.
 

***'s generosity is memorable, too. He was a true giver with a heart of gold. He loved giving to loved one and stranger alike. Maybe a chicken for the pot, or maybe some financial assistance. For every birthday, Christmas, or wedding *** would give a commemorative coin.
 

You will recall that *** loved taking the family to Twin Rocks at Rockaway. He'd bask in the sun while the young ones cavorted in the surf. Then they could hardly find him when they came in because he'd tanned so well he blended in with the sand.
 

Of course, you'd remember that he was a great cook and restauranteur. He knew his business and did it well.
 

So, we will all remember ***, and will love him yet. His death has not changed that. He will be remembered for many of the little, routine things: the way he smiled, the things that made him laugh and cry and even what made him angry. You will remember the way his voice sounded, and the touch of his hand. You will remember the many happy and sad times, the good and bad times you went through together. You will remember and you will love.
 

I want to speak to your hearts today. You know that life can be very difficult. You know that we all handle life's difficulties in different ways. We respond in different ways to the same set of circumstances. You may not understand how *** handled hard times. You may not, but God does! Man looks at the outward appearance: how things look to the human eye. God looks at the heart. That's what makes this time hard, because none of us can look into ***'s heart and know just what he was thinking and feeling in his hard times.  Just remember how affected he was by his illness and pain.
 

Grief is never easy; it is a heavy burden to bear. It causes all sorts of emotions to rise up within us: We may feel angry that our loved one is taken in death; you may be angry at *** for making such a decision; you may be angry with the doctors for not being able to cure him; you may be angry with God, too!  We may feel fear, because we are reminded of our own mortality and the fragility of life. We may feel regret, and we may feel guilt, because we wish we could have known what to say or do to make things come out differently. We may feel deep depression because of the unalterable change ***'s death has brought. There is surely a pain like a hot burning dagger in your hearts.
 

It may feel that your grief and pain are shredding you. You may remember your last meeting with *** and you may be wondering: "Is there anything I could have said, or done, that would have altered this event?" But please remember that you are not to blame. You need not carry a load of guilt on top of your load of grief.  This is not a time for blame, it is a time for grace.  Give *** grace, and give yourself grace, too.
 

So we come today in our anger and fear and regret and depression and pain. And we come to ask God, the giver of all our emotions, to help us through this dark time to a brighter and happier day.
 

***'s death has introduced indelible change. You will never be the same again. But God can help you. His power can deliver you. His love can comfort you. His peace can calm you. His Son can shepherd and keep and save you.
 

There are some lessons we ought to learn which will enable us to go on through the worst of times. Here are some things God wants you to know:
 

First, God wants you to know that He loved ***. He was not just a number in God's creation, he was an individual, precious in the sight of God. He was created in the image of God and God knew his name even before he was born.
 

Then, God wants you to know that He loves you, too. The Bible says, "God is love." (1 John 4:9) and He showed His love in sending His Son, Jesus: "This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." (1 John 4:10 [NIV]).

Now, you may not feel that He loves you right now. But He does. His love is based on His action, not our emotions.
 

Further, God wants you to know that He feels what we feel! His heart is sympathetic to us. The Bible reminds us: "For this reason He had to be made like His brothers in every way, in order that He might become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that He might make atonement for the sins of the people. Because He Himself suffered when He was tempted, He is able to help those who are being tempted." (Hebrews 2:17-18 [NIV]). He wept beside the tomb of His friend Lazarus before raising him from the dead. He knows what sorrow feels like; He understands.
 

God wants us to know that life is delicate and precious. The Bible likens our days to a breath, a vapor, a weaver's shuttle, an evening shadow and a handbreadth. Someone rightly said, "Life is fragile, handle it with prayer!" Since life is uncertain and tenuous, we ought to say with the Psalmist, "LORD, make me to know my end, And what is the extent of my days, Let me know how transient I am." Psalms 39:4 [NASB]).
 

God wants us to know how to trust Jesus Christ. He is the Good Shepherd and we can trust His care. He is the Great High Priest and He always lives to intercede for us at the Throne of Grace. He speaks gently to us, saying, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:28-30 [NIV]).
 

You likely feel like Jeremiah, whose lamentation went like this: "Peace has been stripped away, and I have forgotten what prosperity is. I cry out, 'My splendor is gone! Everything I had hoped for from the LORD is lost!' The thought of my suffering and homelessness is bitter beyond words. I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The unfailing love of the LORD never ends! By His mercies we have been kept from complete destruction. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each day. I say to myself, 'The LORD is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in Him!' The LORD is wonderfully good to those who wait for Him and seek Him. So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the LORD. (Lamentations 3:17-26 [NLT]).
 

I encourage you to take the position of the poet who said,
 
 

When death comes calling, we feel like someone pulled the rug right out from under us. Our lives are topsy-turvy, and everything seems to be ganging up on us. The Psalmist has a word for us in such a time:
 

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever - present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging. There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells. God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day. Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; He lifts His voice, the earth melts. The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Come and see the works of the LORD, the desolations He has brought on the earth. He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth; He breaks the bow and shatters the spear, He burns the shields with fire. 'Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.' The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress." Psalms 46:1-11 (NIV)
 

Notice that the Psalmist said, "God is our refuge." Sometimes we just need a place to hide out for awhile. God's arms are a safe place to do that; and His arms are always open to you.
 

We read that God is "an ever - present help in trouble." Note that He helps "in" trouble; not before or after it only. But while troubles are happening to us, God is an ever present help. He is not absent or far removed from us.
 

When all the terrible things happen in our lives, things which are pictured here as earthquake, tidal wave, volcano and civil unrest, even then we can have peace. God is in control; and He bids us, "Be still!" That means "relax," "cease striving" and "be at peace."
 

The LORD Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. We can trust Him; we can rest in Him; we can be at peace.