"WHERE IN THE WORLD CAN YOU FIND LOVE?"
Written and preached by David P. Nolte




JOHN 3:16, 1 JOHN 4:9, 10


(SKITS): 1. someone uses a flower: "He loves me! He loves me not!  He loves me!  He loves me not!  Phooey!  I want God to love me!  I'll try again!  He loves me!  He loves me not!  He loves me!  He loves me not!  He LOVES me!  Yes!  God really does love me!"  2. "Man!  I don't feel good.  The rain's falling, my friend is angry with me, and I guess God doesn't love me!"  (Time passes) "I sure feel better today!  It's sunny and my friend forgave me!  I guess God does love me after all!"  3. "I've prayed about my job situation and God doesn't even seem to hear me.  He probably doesn't love me!"  (Later) "Boy!  God sure worked out that job situation!  I wanted one thing to happen but instead He brought something else to pass that was better!  I guess He does love after all!"  Wow! What hokey ways to decide if God loves you! But, you know, that question is something we all probably think about from time to time: "Does God really love me?" and "How can I be sure He loves me?" Maybe we ask, "Does anybody love me?" Or "Where in the world can I find love?" We want to think about that today. To help us think through the question of where we can find love, I want to tell you about an ancient parable. In the parable a wealthy merchant undertook a long journey. Rather than leave them home, he took all his precious jewels with him. On the way he met another traveler who befriended him, making it look like a chance encounter. His real intent was to steal the merchants jewels. Both these individuals were on a quest: the merchant for sales, the fellow traveler to gain the jewels. We are like them in a way. As we journey through life:
  1. WE ARE ALL ON SOME SORT OF QUEST: WHAT ARE YOU SEEKING?
    1. There are any number of things people seek. Some are worthy and some unworthy. Some attainable and some not. On our journey through life we are on a quest. Our search may be for:
      1. Wealth and ease.
      2. Health and comfort.
      3. Fame and popularity.
      4. Power and control.
      5. Meaning and purpose and direction in life.
      6. Security and peace.
      7. Success and fulfillment.
      8. Love and acceptance.
    2. While we all seek for some things we want but don't really need, we also seek for things we actually do need. Abraham Maslow, a secular psychologist, developed a hierarchy of human needs. While he didn't go far enough, he is right in saying that people have some definite needs. These are things we want, things we need and things for which we quest.
      1. Physiological things: air, food, sleep, water.
      2. Safety: consistency in a world of chaos; security of home and family; law and order.
      3. Love: belonging to some group and being accepted; Appreciation and applause.
      4. Esteem: a feeling of competence in completing a task; recognition and attention from others.
      5. Self-actualization: a desire to become more and more of what we are capable of becoming; realizing our potential.
    3. Being a secular humanist, Maslow completely overlooked the most significant need: the Spiritual need: forgiveness of sins, personal relationship to Jesus Christ, the kingdom of God and eternal life through Him.
    4. Unfortunately, many are like Maslow and focus primarily on this body and this life and this moment to the exclusion of the life to come and eternity. They gain the world and lose their souls. They pursue temporalities and disregard eternal issues. But Maslow was right: People do need and seek love. What are you looking for? What is your quest? Perhaps it is for real, authentic, sincere love.
The merchant was on a quest for sales of his product. The would-be friend was in quest of the merchant's jewels. At the end of each day as they came to an inn, they'd share a room for the night. Each had his own mat and pillow and wash basin with a towel. Somehow the merchant became suspicious of his companion and was sure the man was really after his jewels. In light of that, he concocted a plan to ensure the safety of his valuable stones. Every night he'd politely give the fellow the privilege of washing up first. When the false friend left the room, after making sure the man wasn't watching, the merchant would hide his jewels in a safe place. When the thief returned, the rich man would make his exit. The rogue would quickly search high and low for the stones. He'd look in all the merchant's luggage, in his bed and under his pillow. In a way, we are like that man; we are on a quest and we often look for our desires feverishly.
  1. SOME PEOPLE SEEK HIGH AND LOW FOR LOVE: WHERE ARE YOU SEEKING?
    1. When we lose something we look in every conceivable place. We pull out drawers, we lift stacks of paper, we remove couch cushions, we open cupboards. High and low, here and there, up and down we look for the lost object.
    2. People look for love in many places; not all of them smart or good. Some of the places we seek actually bring us into bondage and danger. Where do people look for love?
      1. On the internet in chat rooms.
      2. In singles bars.
      3. In illicit and immoral and adulterous sexual relationships.
      4. In an ill advised marriage or running from one marriage to another.
      5. In various clubs and social organizations.
      6. In somehow earning or buying love through doing favors or giving gifts.
      7. In changing ourselves into something we are not so we might somehow become acceptable and loveable.
    3. There are people who will cheat for love, who will steal for love, who will kill for love, who will lie for love, who will offer to pay for love, who will die for love, who seek high and low for love --- all in their quest for love.
    4. A few years ago, my wife's grandmother Lillie misplaced her glasses. She couldn't see the tip of her nose without her glasses. So she was moving papers, going from room to room, retracing her steps and growing frantic. Marlene asked her, "Grandma, what are you looking for?" Lillie said, "My glasses! I can't find them anywhere!" Marlene said, "But, Grandma, you're wearing your glasses!" And sure enough; she was!
The merchant was on a journey seeking for sales and the thief was seeking for the precious jewels. He sought high and low for them. But search as he would he came up empty and would retire angry at his failure. His frenzied and frantic and fruitless attempts drove him into an unhappy sulk. Where could the merchant have secreted his stones? Probably he had them with him when he went to bathe. The thief would have to think of some way to separate the bounty from its rightful owner. But the answer eluded him. And the jewels eluded him. Sometimes that's how it is with our quest for love, too.
  1. LOVE OFTEN SEEMS ELUSIVE: WHY CAN'T YOU FIND IT?
    1. Many people
      1. go through all of life without ever being told, "I love you!"
      2. Never experience a wholesome, satisfying, reciprocal love relationship.
      3. are like the psalmist whose misery caused him to lament, "Look to my right and see; no one is concerned for me. I have no refuge; no one cares for my life." Psalms 142:4 (NIV).
    2. Have you ever you felt like that? Do you feel as noticed and appreciated as the underside of a rock? Have you felt as appreciated as ants at a picnic, as fleas on a dog, or as a boil on the backside?
    3. Think about this: You may be loveless and find that love is elusive for a number of reasons:
      1. If we are seeking love in the wrong places and in the wrong ways, (buying it, earning it, demanding it) it will always elude us.
      2. If we are seeking love that always makes life easy, that always lets us have our way, that is always indulgent, and is without conflict we won't find real love.
      3. If we are seeking love without giving love back, love will never be found.
      4. If we are seeking love that really isn't love but is some counterfeit, (lust, mere emotion, a fleeting infatuation) love will always evade you.
    4. There are many who don't know where love is to be found or don't know how to find it or don't know how to accept it or who don't know how to recognize it when it comes. For them love becomes as slippery as a watermelon seed and as hard to grasp as a handful of sand and as elusive as the mythical Sasquatch.
The hidden jewels were elusive to the thief. He just couldn't find them try as he would. As the journey came to its end, and farewells were uttered, the merchant informed the fellow traveler that he knew all along of his nefarious intentions. The thief was astonished and speechless. The merchant said, "You poured your energies into looking everywhere -- except under your own pillow! The wealth was nearer to you than you realized." Love often seems elusive: why can't you find it? As we go through life frantically looking for love, acceptance, and meaningful relationships we often miss the one true love, the one genuine acceptance and the eternal relationship Jesus offers us. It is near to us, but we miss it in our frantic search elsewhere. Love is as near to you as you let Jesus be. Love is waiting to touch your life and change it. Love invites you to come. Love doesn't say, "Clean up and come!" It says, "Come and let me clean you up!" Love doesn't demand, "Change, and then come!" It graciously invites, "Come, come as you are and I will work the needed changes." Just as you are: proud, arrogant, self-sufficient; deep in sin; miserable; unloved, unwanted, unhappy -- come. Jesus kindly says, "All that the Father gives Me shall come to Me, and the one who comes to Me I will certainly not cast out." John 6:37. Whatever other love you may have shared or experienced; whatever other affection may have been yours, you don't know what it is to be loved until you let God love you. He bids you come, He promises to receive you, and He waits to love you.
Story from Deliver Us From Evil, Ravi Zacharias, Nashville, Word Publishing


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